ECAD — Educated Canines Assisting with Disabilities

The book that I have recommended the most recently or that I have encouraged people to listen to on audio is “Until Tuesday: A Wounded Warrior and the Golden Retriever Who Saved Him” by Luis Carlos Montalvan.  I do appreciate memoirs of people who have done good things and helped others in some way and this book certainly fits the bill.  I also appreciate stories of animals that have helped people so this book is definitely a winner.  Also — judging books by covers, which I KNOW we shouldn’t do … how can we say no to this handsome cover?

I finished reading this book and really wanted to learn more about service dogs.  I wanted to have a program at the library to raise awareness about the role of service dogs and how they are more than “just” seeing eye dogs.

It was serendipity, because the only ECAD facility mentioned in the book was in New York, but shortly after I read the book the breeding center was in the local paper and I learned more about families could get involved.  I have become a foster family and my children went to summer camp there and loved it.  I feel this is a win win scenario for  my children are learning about these wonderful opportunity for service and they are also learning dog training and husbandry skills that will serve a life-time of pet care.

So this sort of falls into the previous post — what is important?  Giving back to the community.  Life is short — do what you can to help others and when I take a dog into my home for a weekend to be one small part of his or her complete two and a half years of training.  I have helped just a little and that sweet loving animal has helped me too.

FLYing or Finally Love Yourself

A number of years ago a friend introduced my to a web site called, “The FLYLady“.

The name of the web site comes from the concept of finally loving ourselves and when we do we FLY. We bear a huge burden of needing things to be perfect, so either we try to be perfect and we fail so we hate ourselves or because we have failed in the past we don’t even try.

The FLYLady also states that our house is in a state of CHAOS (can’t have anyone over syndrome — this is my favorite!) and oh how my house is in this state. However, she keeps repeating herself in saying that if you do a little each day, eventually you will be able to have people over. It didn’t get to this state in a day, so you can get it better in many days.

Now — I do appreciate what she says and I do strive to follow some of her ideas. The bane of my existence used to be my sink. Somehow the recycling cans would gather and not get rinsed out. Dishes and pots and pans would just gather until I could no longer rinse the blender and then I would have to load the dishwasher and deal with scum filled recyclables. It was gross and it would stink.

Now, I load the dishwasher at every meal and it does take two or three days to fill the dishwasher since there are only three of us, but the recycling is dealt with when it is created and the dishes are done at the end of every meal. I still leave the items in the drying rack (much to my mother’s chagrin because she eschews that dishes aren’t done until they are put away, but I am not perfect and that is okay). I do not scrub the sink every night like is advised by the FLYLady, but at not there is nothing dirty in the sink.

I dream of the day when I follow the rest of FLYLady tenets … but hey I all glory in the small accomplishment and move forward.

The next step? Decluttering: do you love it, do you need it, do you have room for it?

Heart Healthy Diet VS Isagenix

Everyone knows what a heart healthy diet is: lots of fruits, vegetables, and lean meat. In a heart healthy diet you monitor your calorie intake and make sure you have lots of fiber. You limit sugar and white flour. This is what we are told to strive for and somehow life gets in the way.

Isagenix is a health and wellness company that offers all kinds of meal alternatives and supplements to deal with the stress of life and help nurture our bodies to keep strong on a daily basis.

To learn more about the benefits of their products, Isagenix hired researchers to perform a third party clinical study. The scientists at the University of Illinois at Chicago did a 10-week study with 54 obese women with a body mass index above 35. This study included a one day a week fast.

At the end of the study — the average total weight loss was 56% more with the Isagenix products, 47% more fat lost and twice as much visceral fat lost (that is the fat around the important internal organs – it is believed that this fat leads to many health issues).

Isn’t your health so important that you want to learn more about what you can do?

To learn more please follow the link:

Click to access Isagenix_Clinical_Research_Summary.pdf

Happy Birthday Mother!

How is it that we really don’t understand mothers until we become one? I mean I would say that I have always loved my mother, but full appreciation didn’t happen until I had to deal with dirty diapers, sick children at 2 AM and the ghastly fear of looking at my teenage son face to face and realizing suddenly that he is no longer a little boy. That one day VERY soon he may be taller than me … that’s okay, he still sits on my lap when no friends are around and he feels like it … as in when he is ill and needs comfort.

My mother is a wonderful woman, full of life experience and the hard earned wisdom of a life well lived. She celebrated 51 years of marriage this past August and raised three daughters. She has 3 grandsons and 2 granddaughters. (Don’t forget the grand-kitties and grand-dog!)

Her children have traveled the world and around the US. She has traveled to see them and gone with them on various escapades. She has written poetry and fairy tales. She has quilted, knitted and painted. She is a voracious reader and and enjoyed numerous Mystery Writers Conferences over the past few years. She is constantly curious to learn new things.

She may seem quiet — but give her a costume assignment for a dinner at a conference and she will pull out the glorious blond wig in a moment.

She may seem reserved — but she will sled down hills with her grandchildren and play with Nerf guns that her grandson buys her for her birthday. Those Nerf foam pellets were flying and furniture was being used as shields and laughter filled the home as my kids took on their grandparents. It was one of those moments that I hold dear.

My mother is an amazing woman and I am so thankful that I lived long enough to realize this epiphany.

Happy Birthday Mom! Live long and prosper!

Spring Cleaning … in Autumn?

I hate cleaning, but somehow it makes more sense to clean in the Autumn than the Spring. I mean we are going to spend the next six months inside — shouldn’t we clean now? Why clean in the Spring when we can spend the following six months exploring our yards and screened in porches? My cats love Spring because that means I start leaving the door to the porch open and they can hear bird calls live and in real time until Autumn.

The other day my daughter and I were cleaning. We had moved furniture before school and there were some things that hadn’t gotten picked up. Then we needed to clean up my office a little because the great paper chase had vomited all over the floor. We re-cycled and shredded and still it looks like a library got sick all over, but hey we tried!

I had my kids go through their collection of shoes and find those that no longer fit … which means we had a large bag to be donated. As my daughter sent the shoes into the clothes bin at the store, I did a little hallelujah dance that something left the home. Always an exciting moment! So much stuff comes in on a weekly basis that I strive to get something out — especially in the Autumn when I know we will be with it closely for the next few months.

I have been receiving emails from a website called FlyLady ( http://www.flylady.net/ ) — a website that helps Side-Tracked Home Executives Fly through life. She states we try to do things perfectly and then we get upset at ourselves because we aren’t so we need to cut large tasks into smaller tasks and then cut it into 15 minutes increments … you can do anything for 15 minutes. Not that I follow the emails, but she does give me ideas of what I could do and since reading her posts I have kept my sink clear of dishes, which for me is a major accomplishment!

So happy Autumn Cleaning!

Happy Equinox … a day of balance

The first day of Autumn is always a highlight in my book — cool crisp weather, beautiful colors, and great activities with friends and family.

This is when we need to do that squirrel prepare for winter thing: stack firewood, stock pantry with non-perishables (in case of a blizzard, or recently an October storm!), and think about putting away outdoor furniture. Since it is still wonderful weather (just need a sweater) we don’t actually put away the garden furniture because we can still sit outside and drink coffee and read a book or watch the dog run around like a banshee trying to catch leaves.

The children have been begging to go pick apples. Since we have plans for most of the rest of the weekends in September, I hope the first frost doesn’t come early for we will be picking apples in October. Yes I know, October?? Usually by this point we have picked at least once by now! Another Autumn activity is going to a Renaissance Faire with friends. I haven’t done that in years, but it is indeed time to do that again! Now the question is, can I find appropriate clothes? I used to have them … somewhere.

Balance — between dark and light, between work and play, between world and spirit. In this moment is where we find peace, so mote it be…

Moving on after obstacles … when do you know you have?

Have you ever just wondered have I moved on?

After a death in the family, or divorce or some other calamity have you ever asked the question, “Is it over? Have I moved on?”

I would like to think I have — I have gone to graduate school, moved, raised kids, made new friends and kept some of the old (everyone sing with me!) and most people would say, yes I have moved on. For the most part I would say I have even done reasonably well.

But there are moments when I say — despite appearances I am still in my dark void. These thoughts usually come at around this time of year when I face the anniversary. I guess I need to remember that grief is a cycle not a linear experience.

Often times — society tells us what to feel and how to feel and even how long to feel our feelings. If we are crying we are told to buck up and be strong, if we are stoic we are told to let it all out.

Grief visits us every year and we see a different face each time — it is never the same guest. This is what is so surprising — you expect the same old mask and then something new comes to call and you lay out tea and sandwiches and invite him to stay for a chat. But like any visitor — he can’t stay too long for guests and fish grow unwelcome after three days.

What do we sacrifice?

According to the social media, I am a member of the Me Generation.  That generation born in the time period of 1970 to 1990 (otherwise known as Generation X — but since no mutant powers have manifested yet … I really don’t know which name to use). I feel funny saying that I am a Me Generation member. 

I am a mother — I don’t feel as if my first priority is me.  I feel that my children are my main focus: providing a safe warm environment for them to grow and learn.  I feel that my cats get a fair amount of my attention — special medicinal food and clean cat boxes.  I feel that when we are in town I volunteer with Educated Canines Assisting with Disabilities — because they are an absolutely wonderful group and everyone should look into their work. 

Yes there are days when I relish staying at home and reading or hanging out with my kids, but I don’t feel selfish. We are told that though it is the Me Generation — this isn’t just selfishness.  Part of being Me, is the belief of love yourself, be yourself, personal health and well-being.  This generation of joggers, walkers, and bicyclists are in it for the health, not to get from Point A to Point B.

We are told that this generation has a harder time for everyone is more competitive now and spaces are limited.  We have more self-esteem and fewer opportunities. Many of my peers seem to have delayed the child-rearing years — if they have any, they are having just one baby.

So yes — maybe we are the Me Generation … I guess the main question is what is important to you and what are you willing to sacrifice to get it!  

The Summer that really wasn’t…

It is my humble opinion that just last week was June and the last day of school and despite the chilly autumn evenings and the turning of the leaves and the fact that students have returned to school — summer hasn’t passed.

How could it?

I don’t remember it and I assure you I have not had an alcohol induced moments of forgetfulness or other activities that may alter memory unless you call parenting such an activity.

I wrote, but never published, a Summer Reading List.  On this list were books that were going to keep me enlightened and informed.  Books I would read with my kids to help them with summer reading assignments and also just to stay cool as a Mom because they liked them so much.  So here goes … the famous list:

1) The Wrong Girl by Hank Phillippi Ryan — a Sister in Crime author who blogs with Jungle Red Writers — she sent me an ARC and I loved “The Other Woman” — this moves to the top of the list

2) World War Z by Max Brooks (Mel Brooks’ son writes a book about the Zombie Apocolypse — my son read the book and saw the movie … said the movie was nothing like the book … Go Team Jerusalem — just remember when trying to survive the zombie apocolypse don’t throw a wild party with loud music … zombies will come and check it out and walls can’t keep them out forever!)

3) Heirs and Graces by Rhys Bowen — A Sister in Crime Author who blogs with Jungle Red Writers … great series

4) Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter by Seth Grahame-Smith (my son loved it and we all saw the movie together … the movie was good, but my son said the book was better)

5) A Tine to Live a Tine to Die by Edith Maxwell — A Sister in Crime Author — met her at conferences a few times … eager to read about a local food mystery

6) Uncle Tom’s Cabin by Harriet Beecher Stowe — on my children’s summer reading list so, since I have never read it myself, I thought I would read it so we could discuss it as a family ( A Connecticut Author)

7) The Prince and the Pauper by Mark Twain (Another Connecticut Author) — my daughter needs to read this one and so since I am reading about vampires and zombies for my son I figured I could read one for my daughter … can’t play favorites!!!

8) some yet to be determined trashy romance based in the Highlands because I just love those and I need to compensate for #6 and #7!

9) The Heist by Janet Evanovich and Lee Goldberg — just because I love the entertainment value of Janet Evanovich

10) Buried in a Bog by Sheila Connolly — A Sister in Crime Author — I just heard her speak (and had a lovely dinner with her) and I haven’t yet gotten to her County Cork Mystery … but it is indeed on my list!

So I can honestly say that I read #1 (great book — HIGHLY recommended), a number of #8s, and I listened to #9 on audio book.  Quite good.

But I know summer didn’t really happen because the other seven didn’t get done.  Though for example I didn’t read “The Prince and the Pauper” because my daughter said it was BORING and old-fashioned so she read “Moby Dick” by Herman Melville.  I do not lie — who in their right mind would chose “Moby Dick”  over Mark Twain?

I was going to listen to the audiobook of “Uncle Tom’s Cabin” with the children as a family — but my son started reading it on his own and preferred not to hear it as well.  We did join a friend at the Harriet Beecher Stowe House in Hartford, CT — that was great.  So we needed to listen to something more upbeat in the car; which turned out to be “Angels & Demons” by Dan Brown… teenagers!

I may not have gotten all the way to Sheila Connolly’s version of Ireland, but I did finish up the Apple Orchard series which somehow I got behind on.  So I did do my part in supporting Sisters in Crime authors.

Listening to “The Heist” did start an interest in Lee Goldberg and so I ordered a copy of the first Mr. Monk series on audiobook and I really did enjoy that.

So it was not the summer I had planned … but the reading part was quite enjoyable.  Man, I wish I could say the same about everything else!